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FUBAR Hill Forum

Berm speak => Livestock Bar & Grill => Topic started by: balsum fractus on November 15, 2009, 04:02:23 PM

Title: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on November 15, 2009, 04:02:23 PM
It was a dark and stormy night.......
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on November 15, 2009, 04:22:01 PM
and the electricity was off, so to pass some time...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Buzzardbeak on November 15, 2009, 05:10:43 PM
...we passed around the Mickey Mouse watch, who's hands were on.......
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on November 15, 2009, 07:01:47 PM
..Michael Jackson's ......
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Onepoint on November 15, 2009, 09:04:27 PM
Monkey..
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on November 15, 2009, 09:23:41 PM
(whew good lord i'm glad its stetto's turn  :devil:)
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: stetto on November 16, 2009, 04:06:03 AM
...wrench, not to be confused with his baboon...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on November 16, 2009, 08:03:13 AM
pictures, yeah, it was literally a zoo around there, so Carl was cookin up some...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Buzzardbeak on November 16, 2009, 08:36:02 AM
good times by grabbing his.....
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on November 16, 2009, 05:03:03 PM
ford pickemup truck and heading...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: wtxsflyr on November 17, 2009, 04:34:09 PM
heading north to the Fubar hill.....
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on November 17, 2009, 04:53:33 PM
and in the back of the truck he has...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Buzzardbeak on November 17, 2009, 05:32:28 PM
lostsa airplanes for fubar flying, and a genuine Wyoming version of......
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on November 17, 2009, 10:12:29 PM
 fried chikin wings which he "borrowed" from.....
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on November 18, 2009, 12:24:45 AM
that fast food restaurant that has
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: wtxsflyr on November 18, 2009, 07:01:55 AM
waitresses in super short orange shorts (say that three times real fast) which.....
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on November 18, 2009, 07:25:19 AM
for a really really good tip, will...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Buzzardbeak on November 18, 2009, 12:21:35 PM
...spank you, to a faretheewell with a .........
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on November 18, 2009, 02:29:22 PM
..snow blower attachment. (Can you say "hurts so good"?) Meanwhile, behind the candy counter,............
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on November 18, 2009, 05:15:42 PM
Jetmex was begging for something sweet, like...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on November 18, 2009, 06:45:29 PM
..grits fried in transmission oil infused with pine beetle husks and lovingly cradled in dried kelp soaked in shark droppings and covered with a delightful rattlesnake puree...yessirree...a real delicacy down there in the hanger.........
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on November 18, 2009, 10:05:03 PM
of Incontinence, errr incontipence, errr intercontinental, er.... 
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Buzzardbeak on November 19, 2009, 08:26:01 AM
...that thing, which smells like a mixture of diesel fuel and sewage, with just a hint of.......
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on November 19, 2009, 08:36:57 AM
mesquite and applewood smoke...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on November 19, 2009, 06:20:56 PM
..MexTex style, however that dish is just for tourists....the strong of pallette enjoy a hearty bowl of......
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on November 19, 2009, 06:32:51 PM
some of that Canukistan porridge, which is chock full of...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: wtxsflyr on November 20, 2009, 06:18:27 AM
smoked prairie dog, and extra fresh geoducks, a combination that will.....
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Onepoint on November 20, 2009, 07:08:54 AM
...Surely grow hair even on ...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on November 20, 2009, 07:59:15 AM
a Xoloitzcuintli dog because...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Buzzardbeak on November 20, 2009, 09:20:34 AM
everyone knows an Xoloitzcuintli dog loves spicy food, which generates a lot of.......
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on November 20, 2009, 09:24:29 AM
interest from the hooter gals, because they are not used to hairless dogs, but they are used to hairless...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Buzzardbeak on November 20, 2009, 11:18:29 AM
..bald guys, who should know better, but continue to drool on their.....
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on November 20, 2009, 05:50:24 PM
way to visit the biggest ball of twine in Minnesota............
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on November 20, 2009, 06:08:43 PM
and then they go to the biggest ball of twine in the world... located in Cawker City, Kansas, and then...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on November 20, 2009, 08:42:36 PM
... stop at the world famous Tribune hobby store to buy a couple of sticks of balsa for..............
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Onepoint on November 20, 2009, 08:52:50 PM
...firewood, since no one remembers how to glue them together anymore, but on the way out they saw..
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on November 20, 2009, 09:37:03 PM
Carl trying to use balsa to smoke...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on November 20, 2009, 09:47:28 PM
.....but Frazz offered him a cigar, saying they tasted better.......
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on November 20, 2009, 11:01:00 PM
when you imagine they are freshly rolled on a young virgins thigh, but, in reality...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: stetto on November 21, 2009, 05:59:23 PM
...On the buttocks of a...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on November 21, 2009, 09:25:12 PM
big bad burly behemoth buttugly buffalo, brandishing...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: stetto on November 22, 2009, 06:41:14 AM
...A tube of lipstick that he applied to...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on November 22, 2009, 08:27:28 AM
...his boyfriend's..........
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: jetmex on November 22, 2009, 08:56:21 AM
..white Corvette, spelling out (in full color) Frazz's alma mater, which was....
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: stetto on November 22, 2009, 09:22:45 AM
...A one-room university which he had to walk 10 miles uphill both ways to...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Buzzardbeak on November 22, 2009, 10:41:20 AM
..get to the two story outhouse, framed in......
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on November 22, 2009, 11:16:18 AM
glued up balsa wood...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Buzzardbeak on November 23, 2009, 11:26:27 AM
...which we all know it loses it strength when wet, which caused Frazz to fall......
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on November 24, 2009, 08:19:56 AM
but with dignity, and wish y'alls a happy thanksgiving holiday...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: stetto on November 25, 2009, 06:13:37 AM
...to which the other Fubarians answered...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Onepoint on November 25, 2009, 07:19:44 AM
Have a happy thanksgivingholidayscametoodangsoonthisyear...back at you,  to which...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Buzzardbeak on November 25, 2009, 08:22:49 AM
....the beak wished everyone a relaxing and happy holiday, followed by......
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: stetto on November 26, 2009, 03:43:35 AM
...the Stetto, Stetto-ette & Stettolings cried a great, loud "Happyhappyhappy!", which compelled...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: wtxsflyr on November 26, 2009, 06:46:10 AM
Carl and Billie Sue to say " Happy Thanksgiving to all of our FUBAR brothers and sisters", which....
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: jetmex on November 26, 2009, 09:59:34 AM
...started a mad rush to all the local malls, which were having a huge after Thanksgiving, pre Christmas but not quite Hannukah sale on.....
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: stetto on November 28, 2009, 06:35:16 AM
...nothing, as usual, so Stetto stayed home to hang Christmas lights outside at 40 degrees with a 30-knot cross-wind, all the time thinking...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Onepoint on November 28, 2009, 07:06:47 AM
...if you like pina coladas and getting caught in the rain...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on November 28, 2009, 03:31:54 PM
............... Yours for the rescuing, Princess Fiona! ...............
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: stetto on November 28, 2009, 04:03:24 PM
...They don't say Hanes until I say they say...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Buzzardbeak on November 28, 2009, 08:49:03 PM
....(insert short old gal here) Wwwhhhheere's the beef? Why it's down at ..........
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on November 30, 2009, 12:28:11 PM
....Crazy Stetto's snowblower and spatula emporium! With prices soooooo low that you have to come in to see them for your self !! don't wait, come in today!! Let our eager and somewhat trained staff help you with all your snow blower needs!!! Need a spatula?? Why we can help you there too! Our highly trained spatula specialist can flip and flap you in the right direction.........
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on November 30, 2009, 04:28:56 PM
Not mentioning ^ any names but^^ somebody had^ a little ^ extra ^ sugar ^^ in their ^^ pecan pie^^^ this thanksgiving holiday^^ :disturbed: :disturbed:
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on November 30, 2009, 06:08:11 PM
<pause> Nope, not me...our thanksgiving was back in October..</pause>
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Onepoint on November 30, 2009, 07:17:50 PM
mmm, spatulas, can never have enough good spatulas.
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on December 01, 2009, 09:34:34 PM
.....especially for flipping your Krispy Kreme donuts......
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Buzzardbeak on December 02, 2009, 08:23:46 AM
.....into the truck for a road trip to Fubar Hill to visit the.......
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Onepoint on December 02, 2009, 09:46:15 AM
Infamous hayfeeder, because everyone knows...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: stetto on December 02, 2009, 11:57:44 AM
...that without a treacherous, balsa-hating hayfeeder you ain't been...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on December 02, 2009, 07:37:18 PM
...worthy enough to wear the famous paper hat...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Buzzardbeak on December 03, 2009, 09:38:17 PM
..and have the masses kneel before you, shouting.......
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on December 03, 2009, 10:28:49 PM
Hey......teachah.........leave them kids alone.......
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on December 04, 2009, 10:00:19 PM
..alone????  One is the loneliest number....................
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on December 05, 2009, 06:59:21 AM
number?   number 9...number 9... number 9...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on December 05, 2009, 12:27:10 PM
 9????   99 Red balloons.......Ninety-nine red balloons
Floating in the summer sky ......
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on December 05, 2009, 09:23:49 PM
Sky? ???  Lucy in the skyyyyyyy.. with diamonds.....
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on December 06, 2009, 03:56:15 PM
diamonds ? Diamonds are forever (forever, forever)
Throw your diamonds in the sky if you feel the vibe
Diamonds are forever (forever, forever, forever).................................
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on December 06, 2009, 05:30:19 PM
Forever? :eusa_boohoo:

Let me take you down, 'cause I'm going to...... Strawberry Fields.
Nothing is real....... and nothing to get hung about.
Strawberry Fields forever.
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on December 06, 2009, 08:39:56 PM
fields? Cotton fields......
It was down in Louisiana,
Just about a mile from Texarkana,
In them old cotton fields back home......
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Buzzardbeak on December 06, 2009, 09:11:50 PM
...Home,
Home, home on the range,
where the deer and the hay feeder play,
where seldom is heard, a discouraging word, an the sky is full of snow all daaaayyyy.

Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on December 07, 2009, 08:37:42 PM
day???

Day, me say day-o
Daylight come and me wan' go home......
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on December 07, 2009, 10:33:39 PM
Home? :eusa_think:  I'll beeee hooooooommme........  for Chrissssssstmassssss  (in onepoints best Dean Martin in the shower singing)  :disturbed:
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Buzzardbeak on December 08, 2009, 10:31:02 AM
singing????

(i wish I was ) singing in the rain, just singing in the rain, what a glorious feeling, iit's above freezing again.
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on December 08, 2009, 11:38:19 AM
freezing ???...     It's a cold world that we live in all the people say
That this world is gettin' colder day by day
Too little warmth left in our lives
I don't know if what the people say is true
But I noticed there's a change in you
Too little warmth left in your eyes
I am freezing, no Love In This Ice Age
Whoa, Whoa
I am freezing, there's no Love In This Ice Age
Whoa, Whoa
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on December 08, 2009, 09:52:09 PM
Ice ????

You're as cold as ice
You're willing to sacrifice our love
You never take advice
Someday, you'll pay the price, I know

- buzzard(Foreigner)beak with a mullet.



Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on December 10, 2009, 09:47:20 PM
Mullet ???

Do something about your long, filthy hair
It looks like a rat's nest
Do something about your mullet
Get out the hair clippers, jerk

Cut the mullet
Cut the mullet
Cut the mullet
Cut the mullet

(Wesley Willis)

PS  No offence intended anywhere... this was just the first lyrics with mullet in it I found.  Second verse I felt I shouldnt put here, as we all have morals...... mine are just out in the garage :icon_biggrin:
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: stetto on December 11, 2009, 04:06:26 AM
Hair?

Heah come ol' flat top
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: jetmex on December 12, 2009, 08:43:00 AM
..Oh say can you see

my eyes, if you can

then my hair's too short.....
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on December 12, 2009, 04:30:13 PM
Short?????

They're such short shorts
We like short shorts...............
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on December 12, 2009, 11:15:31 PM
they're ??? 

Say, Candy and Ronnie, have you seen them yet
But they're so spaced out, B-B-B-Bennie and the Jets
Oh but they're weird and they're wonderful
Oh Bennie she's really keen
She's got electric boots a mohair suit
You know I read it in a magazine
B-B-B-Bennie and the Jets
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: jetmex on December 13, 2009, 07:22:55 AM
Jet City Woman.
Wonder where I'd be, you're the air to me.
Jet City Woman.
Eyes like the rain, rain down on me.
Jet City Woman.
No more nights alone I'm almost home now.
Jet City Woman.
Close my eyes, I'm there in my Jet City.....
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on December 13, 2009, 11:31:51 AM
City??

Hot town...summer in the city
Back of my neck is feeling dirty and gritty
Been down, isn't it a pity
Doesn't seem to be a shadow in the city...
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on December 14, 2009, 06:33:21 PM
gritty ???

Time to put your money where your mouth is

Put 'em in a field and let 'em fight it out

I'm running so fast my feet don't touch the ground

I'm a stranger here I'm going down

Let's get down to the nitty gritty

Let's get this show on the road

I'll show you mine if you show me yours

I'm breathing hard - open the door
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: balsum fractus on December 16, 2009, 06:36:10 PM
"PHWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET" <referee blows whistle>

"The opposition is challenging that post on the grounds that it is not a top 25 tune"

"10 year penalty"


"PHWEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet"
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: Frazz on December 16, 2009, 10:09:41 PM
 :notworthy:  I give anyway.  I kinda think buzzard beak was getting tired of singing all of them anyway.  So... now what are we gonna do  :eusa_think:
Title: Re: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.....
Post by: jetmex on December 18, 2009, 04:09:32 PM
"All I wanna do, is have some fun,
I can tell you, I'm not the only one...."

Somebody please stop me....... :eusa_doh:
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